Timo Glock didn’t win, or indeed race, in the 2014 Le Mans 24 Hours last weekend, but he did go fishing using only the pulling power of his mighty chinrug, so that’s nice.
Shortly after this photo was taken, he descaled his impressive catch by rubbing it on his face.
F1BEARDWATCH would also like to congratulate Giancarlo Fisichella and the #51 AF Corse team on also finishing P1 in class at the 2014 Le Mans 24 Hours. It proves that even a beard of such persistently poor quality can propel you to success.
All hail Beard Power.
We at F1BEARDWATCH would like to congratulate DAS BEARDKING on bearding up the 2014 Le Mans 24 Hour podium good and proper. Rebellion Racing’s #12 finished P1 in class and P4 overall with a brand new car.
Timo Glock at the DTM Champions photo shoot
At this point, what we at F1BEARDWATCH want to know is, where was this Proper Beard when you were in F1, Timo? Were you too afeared to challenge DAS BEARDKING?
Thank you kindly! After we sighed with relief at the return of the gingery goodness and basked in its glory, we at F1BEARDWATCH took our sweet time detailing Rob’s folkular adventures. Apologies for the delay.
Rob “I’ve been dead poorly, me” Smedley, Qualifying, 2014 Bahrain Grand Prix.
Well well well. Well well well well well well well. Rob Smedley’s well-documented struggles as a folk musician continue.
During his transition from the red team to the stripey team, Rob became lost in the wilderness with naught but a mandolin for company. He busked, he gigged, he tried his hand at the accordion, he sang I Will Wait at the open mic night of a dusty middle-class pub more times than he can count. Caught in a smart/casual maelstrom of tweed, cardigans and fedoras, he was rescued on Thursday and quarantined in his Bahrain hotel room until the worst effects of his odyssey had worn off.
Still hasn’t had chance to nip to a barber, though.
Charles - Friday practice, Bahrain
There’s an auburn elephant in the room which we’ll get to in a moment, but first we’ll point out that former Caterham driver/current garage loiterer Charles Pic is trying his best to look like a grown up. Or a singer/songwriter.
"I was obviously a lot younger when we did that one race together, but [Nick] always looked so young, then he grew the beard. But, I mean, that’s a mega bonus - imagine, he’s forty, he can take the beard off and still look like twenty-five."-Seb Vettel believes he has figured out Das BeardKing’s facerug strategy. We at F1BEARDWATCH would be shaken to our very cores if he were to be correct.
Well, we at F1BEARDWATCH cannot criticise Nelson for having a bumfluff moustache in his younger days; in fact, it was quite the healthy, dense specimen. However, this does not change the fact that, in combination with that wavy seventies mop, it made him look as though he should’ve been playing bass for Rod Stewart and selling merchandise out of the back of a knackered Transit van.
We at F1BEARDWATCH have finally gotten our hands on the Rush Blu-Ray, rejoice! We were pleased to find a lovely shot of our Patron Saint Harald Ertl - as played by Tom Wlaschiha - loitering in the back of shot during the feature Race For The Chequered Flag: The Making Of Rush. He seems to be thinking “SOON.”
"SOON MY BEARD WILL TAKE OVER THIS FEATURE/THE WORLD," maybe.
We at F1BEARDWATCH wake bleary-eyed from our winter slumber to the glorious sight of Timo Glock displaying his full, bristly plumage on the cover of Germany’s DMAX magazine. Look at him, all rugged and hairy, like he’s going to hike up a mountain and fell a redwood just by nuzzling it. Phwoar! Ahem.